I am very sensitive to caffeine and I have quit coffee over a month ago after drinking one cup a day for over a decade. Most of my withdrawal symptoms like brain fog, fatigue, intermittent sleep, and headaches are gone. My problem is now with anhedonia and apathy. I really feel emotionally dead and I am indifferent to what happens to me or the things around me.
Before I quit, when I would remember my being and pray to my Devine Mother I would feel a overwhelming loving energy that would warm my heart and energize my consciousness to the point I would get tears of joy. I do not feel any of that anymore.
Without that energizing emotional feed back, self remembering and mindfulness feel almost impossible. It is very easy to 'fall asleep' and I never feel as 'awake' as I did before.
My concentration practices like focusing on the candle flame also feels different. My perception is clear but it feels like my consciousness isnt able to fully 'grip' on to the flame. My awareness of the things around me suffers the same thing. My ability to understand concepts or comprehend information also seems to be hindered in some way. I get that deer staring into the headlights feeling a lot. My memory is really bad.
I've double the amount of pranayama and runes exercises. Is there anything else you can recommend? Or do I just wait this out and pray the caffeine wasnt masking a more serious issue from past mistakes.
Before I quit, when I would remember my being and pray to my Devine Mother I would feel a overwhelming loving energy that would warm my heart and energize my consciousness to the point I would get tears of joy. I do not feel any of that anymore.
Without that energizing emotional feed back, self remembering and mindfulness feel almost impossible. It is very easy to 'fall asleep' and I never feel as 'awake' as I did before.
My concentration practices like focusing on the candle flame also feels different. My perception is clear but it feels like my consciousness isnt able to fully 'grip' on to the flame. My awareness of the things around me suffers the same thing. My ability to understand concepts or comprehend information also seems to be hindered in some way. I get that deer staring into the headlights feeling a lot. My memory is really bad.
I've double the amount of pranayama and runes exercises. Is there anything else you can recommend? Or do I just wait this out and pray the caffeine wasnt masking a more serious issue from past mistakes.
We inhabit a quite complex system of bodies with a numerous amount of different processes and circulations. So it is not enough to point at just one component (coffee) and put all the blame on it. Surely coffee is an energy source and you got used to its sensations, but energy concerns our Vital body. Yet, you complain about emotional and mental problems.
So look into what was driving you to consume coffee and crave for its sensations. As an example, modern psychology says that people on the spectrum (i.e. ADHD) self-medicate unconsciously by drinking loads of Coke, coffee, energy drinks, everything that is a stimulant. This is because they then can calm down and focus better. Find out whether this, or something similar, applies to you, since then you will understand your PSYCHOLOGICAL condition better.
When you have found and witnessed whatever psychological defect is responsible, start working on it esoterically (psychological death). An instructor once said: ADHD is laziness of the consciousness. If that is your case, work on it. But also add healthy components to your life style that were missing before. Staying on the example of ADHD, people need to incorporate physical exercises, thorough sleep and food supplements (i.e. magnesium). This allows their bodies to generate the necessary happy hormones (like Serotonin) in order to feel well.
You might see the following pattern: The causes are psychological, so first start working on your psyche, don't focus on having interesting spiritual experiences, when you need to heal first. When you have worked on your psyche, look at all your bodies and give all of them what they need to prosper. Not just one of them.
(ADHD was just an example for a psychological condition. Please make sure to not just focus on that, but to look at all available options.)
So look into what was driving you to consume coffee and crave for its sensations. As an example, modern psychology says that people on the spectrum (i.e. ADHD) self-medicate unconsciously by drinking loads of Coke, coffee, energy drinks, everything that is a stimulant. This is because they then can calm down and focus better. Find out whether this, or something similar, applies to you, since then you will understand your PSYCHOLOGICAL condition better.
When you have found and witnessed whatever psychological defect is responsible, start working on it esoterically (psychological death). An instructor once said: ADHD is laziness of the consciousness. If that is your case, work on it. But also add healthy components to your life style that were missing before. Staying on the example of ADHD, people need to incorporate physical exercises, thorough sleep and food supplements (i.e. magnesium). This allows their bodies to generate the necessary happy hormones (like Serotonin) in order to feel well.
You might see the following pattern: The causes are psychological, so first start working on your psyche, don't focus on having interesting spiritual experiences, when you need to heal first. When you have worked on your psyche, look at all your bodies and give all of them what they need to prosper. Not just one of them.
(ADHD was just an example for a psychological condition. Please make sure to not just focus on that, but to look at all available options.)
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