Hi, I very appreciate Your time and energy, so I'll try be as short and clear as I can.
I very well familiarized with teachings of Samael Aun Weor, other Masters and a lot of lectures of Glorian Publishing.
And I feel terrible pressure from within on practicing these teachings.
However I've this terrible (for me) cycle in which I'm suffering and wandering for reasonable amount of time.
I've addiction to certain popular foods which affect my health, mental state and ability to perceive clearly (consciousness) in bad way.
And generally stagnates my progress on learning concentration which is foundation on every spiritual practice.
I had very strong motivation to end up with this addiction, with help of techniques of transformation of impressions (in Your lectures about Meditation without exertion) I managed to cease this behavior for significant amount of time. Later on, I would fail and again fall for the pressure of addiction and identify with it. And this cycle repeats, repeats and gets more intense and intense. And it destroys both health of organism and spiritual progress.
So it's like classical form of addiction.
I probably have read tenths of times Your lectures about ethics and renunciation.
I am working on the three factors, working to be as conscious and perceiving as possible, and being for other people, not for myself.
Practicing pranayamas with hope that it would make my consciousness stronger and could help me detach from this ego.
As far as I can concentrate I try to review in my imagination these situations, to comprehend them.
I see some patterns, but I've witnessed that intellectual analysis in this type of thing is completely of no use.
I work with concentration, but my body is weakened and I often get asleep or I'm halfway dreaming and can hardly concentrate on anything
So I see that I'm based only in my intellectual center. I've wondered whenever I should work with mantras, to stimulate the heart, so instead of eating these things and thinking how negative it is and how to solve this problem, I would eat these things and cry and feel bad? :-)
There is much less problems on detaching from other strong egos, but this one looks like a determinant of my life.
I've completely no idea how one could reach high degree states of consciousness about which the Master writes when one could hardly work with just one ego.
So a lot of time went into this and I feel I've not moved for and inch in this situation.
And I feel that other egos (which I've put aside when encountered the teaching) are starting to emerge stronger.
I see that now I'm in terrible threat of complete retrogression and degeneration.
So I ask You if You could advise me on this situation?