State of Affairs

What I wish to express here is some gratitude of the resources presented here. Every once in a while I will feel grateful, show up in testimonials, post a testimonial and today is no exception.

First I want to try to comment on the teachings as a whole. This is a very interesting site. It is my personal preference, and it really lacks bias because when I first came to these teachings I had checked out all the different sites. Back then I was ignorant to some degree, every site was judged according to merit. I tried out other sites and their various forms or systems and found them unsatisfactory. If someone has an intellectual thirst for this type of material, it is a crime to seal them off from what could be a useful learning experience by arbitrary and bureaucratic standards such as time. This is a real shame and reflects poorly on the teachings as a whole, it looks cheesy.

This site presents the material in a different matter. Everything is upfront. I can read the material both here and in the more physical form. There are no boundaries or barriers. This model is superior in the sense that it treats the individual like a human or an adult. Most organizations do not do this, they exist on a model where they wave something in front of our faces and go "Hey! Do you want this? Jump through this hoop of fire"! Circus tricks. Or even worse, "pay up". Anyways, to sum up the point: no membership required, no money required. Nothing kills the soul like a good bureaucracy, this is the trick to keeping a good democracy. Anyways...

I didn't need any hype or to be treated immaturely. And this is something I think is sort of universally seen as soon as you arrive at higher establishments, when people are actually trying to "make something" and go beyond the daily hobbling and bickering of the rat race. During the creation of North America for example, land was given freely. Nowadays in North America we have so much land but we cramp in little cubbyholes in the city, we have lost "The Way".

So don't worry, I'm getting to my point here. My point is that this place is the real deal. This is very important because the type of work that is trying to be achieved here is paramount. According to these teachings, we are essentially at the bleeding point of evolution. And if you consider the point in humanity we are at right now, we're in the "Gnostic playground", the world is at our fingertips. And according to Samael Aun Weor, the sort of work that needs to be done here is revolutionary.

In this case, it is imperative that the resources are very reliable, that the source be authentic and very special in order to create what we are trying to create here. Because it is something very difficult that is trying to be achieved on the individual level, it is something like a rocket launch into space. It's no surprise that countries like North Korea are trying to showboat themselves by launching themselves into the heavens above with very powerful three stage rockets. This is a very difficult task even amongst the more well established and quality based first world nations.

So this is a similar effort compared to what we are trying to do, eh? The rocket can be compared to our consciousness. We are trying very hard to develop our consciousness, to sharpen it, to make it aerodynamic, and to develop all the abilities to face all the forces that seek to destroy that effort. These threats are within and outside. The difference is, is that we are trying to launch this conscious effort profoundly into our depths, to dive deeply and scour our internal nature for the Truth, with the satellite of established meditation.

It's very difficult. The rocket launch is easily complicated by other entities that want to control you, that are constantly bickering with you. They are an enormous threat, but really the worse threat comes from within our own psychological country. Really, our little ruler wants to succeed, but refuses to base such rocket launches on any sort of quality based, integral platform. We do it based on slaves, slaves that don't want to work and only exist in the way that most convenient for them to get from birth to death. The end result is failure, not getting our established meditation practice into orbit.

Now falling back onto what I was saying earlier in regards to the quality of this website. There are a lot of resources that I suspect may go without utilization or without enough utilization. Let me start with myself as an example. I would tune into the lectures occasionally as a sort of spiritual pain medication, "mother's little helper" type of deal. I mean, even this is helpful. Sometimes we are in pain and need medication, but still I went on living my life in the way I did before, for the most part. I didn't apply the practices, I listened out of longings. This probably has to do with karma. The discursive psychological elements that overtake the psychological machine and pineal gland, those "I's" and egos, were strong. And that free consciousness was very weak. Yet my spiritual longings were enormous. The end result? Suffering.

So it seems to come in waves. But the consciousness has the power of the Magician, it can tame the storms. Through hard work. Then you can work to pay the pain of that karma, but consciously.

However I do of course have to give credit to the great resources and people behind this site. They are creating a platform to work from. If we utilize the resources here then successful "rocket launches" here become way more likely. A rocket launch is not based on chance. A successful meditation is not based on chance. There are a tremendous amount of mathematical variables at play when calculating the success of each of those scenarios. The difference is, one is a mechanical effort and the other conscious.

So how can you work your best in order to launch a successful meditation practice? I've really become a massive fan of the audio lectures recently. I am an impatient reader. I'll sit down to read something but find Samael Aun Weor's chapter to be a little lengthy, I'll end up learning from it but it provides a lot of room for the Inner I, the psychological "me" to want to move onto the next sophism of distraction.

The audio lectures on the other hand seem to take advantage of a distinct aspect of social psychology. When a human voice arrives in our mind, we seem to take it very seriously. Within this mechanism, I feel, is a very distinctive flaw within the ego. It is really the Achilles heal of the ego. The ego has placed enormous capital on what other people have to say. Verbal or audible mechanisms are very key elements in lust, anger, and envy. So mechanically, it seems that the mind has opened an enormous doorway to what anyone has to say. Normally this is ideal to the ego, where the native environment is filled with conditions within it can propagate. Lustful words, vulgar words, angry words. One of my most powerful flashbulb memories as a four or five year old was having my friend teach me my first curse words on the picnic table at the front of my house. My parents never taught me that, they insisted on keeping me in a pure elemental state, and by doing so they provided me with an enormous gift.

So ever since then, it has been downhill obviously. With so many walking, talking and corrupted people, all this chatter has done a lot of damage to our psyches, we have a lot of karma that we need to deal with.

The audio lectures in particular offer enormous assistance when introduced to the correct conditions. If you start thirsting for them, if you start having the longing to listen to lecture after lecture because you are authentically interested and motivated to propagate a better intellectual culture for yourself, then it seems you are beginning to move to a better place. Beginning to.

If you have difficulty finding the will to listen to these lectures, or to read the books or do any study at all, then it would seem to me that that is a sign of incredible pain, is it not? Simply switching on a lecture is easy and effortless, they download in less than forty seconds. So why are we avoiding this, what pain within us wants to avoid these teachings?

From what I've seen, this is perhaps the most common phenomena among those who I know. They want to avoid the teachings. They, through their psychological Satan of course, through "John Doe", their psychological I. They can't meditate, true, but what is more alarming is that they have enormous difficulty in even facing the teachings in book form, audio form. I myself faced this problem.

Really for me, it goes back a very long way. My most intimate memories were from that of being a child. Those pure and hazy summer days where I was actually outside, I actually knew what dirt felt like between my toes, those days in which I knew peace.

Slowly I entered into this wheel of Samsara, on a psychological level. Daily cycles of repetition. But where was the point of departure? What phenomena started to appear at the beginning of this transition?

It seems obvious when I examine this with my newfound intellectual education that my ethics were breaking down in between age five and thirteen. They were all but gone as soon as I entered my teenage years. As I sought to find my identity in vice and drugs, the prospect of finding that voice inside completely eroded. It was of course, very strong as a child. Eventually society made the voice heard, but through the outside.

So personally I've endured a massive storm and been bounced between the inner voice of my Innermost and these externally presented teachings, which my Innermost has brought me to, combined with the fact that my happiness cannot be found outside of myself regardless of how I approach it.

But it all started with ethics. I've seen my own departure from Eden, at least in this life. I knew what was right, I have strong memories of being an innocent elemental. "Society" introduced to me knowledge of evil, it was me who clung to such ideas. Whatever karma I had was not optimal, that prudence was not strong enough. That Inner voice was not strong enough.

Regardless of our understanding, wherever we are now, it is imperative to take ethics seriously. If you have to do one thing in your life, even if you do not understand why you are doing it, let it be ethical behavior. There is an enormous pain and enormous suffering that comes from engaging in a certain behavior when the voice of your inner behavior is not present.

A good example is trying to quit drugs or pornography. These teachings can instruct you and say "drugs are bad, mmmkay?", so can society. But it will be a joke to you if you don't understand ethics. Cain has killed that Abel, then you have to stop siding with Cain. Only God has power to revive the dead. But blood has it's price. "Blood is bought with blood" as the profane saying goes.

So you have to behave ethically if you want to revive that Abel, that pure elemental spirit of the child. Ethical in the sense that you will not side with the murderer, that false sense of self that murdered that pure elemental of your innocence from childhood.

You have to understand that your work is worthwhile and does have real payoffs. It's very hard to see but it's important to listen to the lectures in order to develop a good understanding and to understand Kaballah. Over time, or better said, personal effort, you start to gain an understanding of how Kaballah relates to yourself. Ethics are very important to understand in this regard when you consider the path required for ascent up the Tree of Life.

The lecture "Matter, Energy and Conscious" is very helpful in conveying how Kaballah operates and very useful to the western mind. I think that Westerners have a fantastic system that suffers from an enormous amount of atheism.

I mean really you could look at ethics like this. "If you behave ethically and avoid looking at an image in such and such a way, or visiting such and such smutty URL, you stand to save 1000 millivolts of transcendental, sexual electricity".

Obviously such values are known intuitively, we have fantastic system that maintains chastity, etc, through the "Internal Voice of Reason", but this is the sort of approach that I had to take in order to understand ethics in an intellectual way. Because the cries of Abel are useless to Cain the coward. We need to go beyond that, we need a systematic, integral approach. And we have the immense benefit of having a culture that respects science. This innate attribute, combined with the study of Kaballah, combined with a rigorous effort, combined with the right attitude and so forth, frees you from the cycle of time. The only thing that can possible stop you at that point, is karma, that has to be paid regardless.

So we all have Malkuth, so that's something every single person on earth has. But if you look at the diagram in the lecture "Matter, Energy, and Consciousness", the path of return to the Ain Soph Aur from Malkuth, Yesod is above that. Yesod is obviously strongly related sexuality. So are ethics important here? This is obvious. Next, we have Hod, the emotional body. Ethics are also very important here!

Emotionally, you can lose such and such millivolts every time you lust at someone in your heart. Or feel envious, or think of someone in a negative way. So ethics are imperative! From a logical, scientific perspective. How can you expect to achieve a distillation, or some sort of experience on a higher level of Kaballah, if you are squandering energies from Yesod in Hod? You can't.

You need to create a clear conduit for energy to move. Malkuth is the human body, we need that. Yesod is knowledge of not squandering the physical and electrical component of the sexual energies, we need that. But then we need to learn how to stop wasting energy in the heart and mind. A great evil exists here and it's pretty hard to overcome, but it requires conscious efforts to restrain and retrain yourself. At this point, if you think badly of someone at this point, it helps to have a positive thought about them and recognize a superior quality that exist within them. This way, you mathematically resolve the karma that the ego generated at that moment, and clear the path so you can move onto the greater spheres of Kaballah, a higher sphere. In a very limited sense, but you can feel it. This is a good experiment...

Each process of the energy presents you with a test, you can't fail any if you want to arrive at more transcendental experience. Expect to be tested in Yesod, Hod, Netzach, etc.

This is hard because your soul is being tested here. Life is suffering regardless of what you think on the matter. Sometimes you just want to curse the world. But no angel curses the earth. So define yourself. We all have karma to pay, but we need to pay it consciously.

So in this way, behaving with perfect ethics, one can arrive at Tiphereth. One can only arrive here with purity, with ethics. This is the breaking point, in my understanding of Kaballah anyways. This is where you start noticing a distinct level of difference. As you can see in the Kaballah study tool, this is where you go from Yetzirah to Briah. It's a distinctively different taste from the fires of Klipoth that you might have known, or Assiah above it.

I'm not trying to teach Kaballah here, I am trying to make a very particular point. We all have karma to pay, and it is sometimes very hard to understand why we are doing it. Because we can behave ethically, and nothing around us changes despite our best behaviors. But then we revert or fail tests, and that's shameful.

Listening to the lectures can help a lot with this, because this is a very exacting science. You can't let one thing slip. If you stub your toe and curse, you have to at least be authentically sorry you did. If you don't understand why, then it's because you lack intellectual culture. You need to study.

A lot of people in school complain about the teachers. "I hate Mrs. So and so, she is such a horrible grader". A simple question can often be applied. "Did you even read the book?". That's what we do. We're interested in this "course", we sign up and don't study. We aren't good students. We aren't sincere students. We read the book for five minutes then hop on Facebook. Sure enough at the end of the semester we log into RateMyProfessor too to give the professor a bad review.

Don't fall into the same habit with these teachings, do not fall into that non verbal condemnation. It is imperative to use your whole body (Malkuth), your sexual energies (Yesod), your whole emotional body (Hod), and your mind (Netzach).

And you also have to prepare for the next sphere. You have to continuously exert that conscious effort continually, using all of your energy from those lower spheres. It's very hard and we often have a lot of pain from karma making things even more difficult. But you have to give everything.

Jesus said unto him, Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind.

It is very important to study. If you really care, and you're really studying, you will have a flurry of tools, levers, pulleys, and so forth that make all of your efforts exponentially more powerful. Take advantage of the knowledge and expertise presented on this site. You have a rare chance to maximize on the pristine conditions to really and practically do some awesome work on your consciousness in this life.

It doesn't have to be this big scary thing. But you do need to thoroughly study how to exploit yourself, to find personal vulnerabilities and exploit them and obtain the maximum harvest of fire from the devil, from yourself, "Your name here".

One technique I've taken up, to give you an example, is to behave a bit more "child like" to try to seem a bit more cute or sweet when I speak. Many people learn to speak "sarcastically" or with a negative sort of drawl, with speculation and cynicism in their voice, or a disheartened tone. We have to exploit all of our behaviors to try and become more sweet, more pure, more ethical. Crime is hidden in the incense of prayer.

You could not ask for more perfect conditions. It is silly how fruitful and how superb the resources are here for what we are trying to do. The problem is not in these teachings, these are complete. The teachers are also fine. The problem is that we are either bad students, or that we are sick and missing class a lot, or missing class because of bereavement. All understandable. What is important is to change.