The Didactic for the Dissolution of the "I"
What is essential within us is to attain the crystallization of the soul. Yet, what is that which we must understand as soul? We must understand as "soul" the conjunction of bodies, attributes, powers, virtues, qualities, etc., which underlie within the Being. The gospels state:
In your patience possess ye your souls... - Luke 21:19
Presently we do not possess our souls; rather, the soul possesses us, since we are a heavy burden for that which is called “soul”, an overwhelming load indeed. So, to attain possession of the soul is a longing; to become the owners of our own souls is formidable; moreover, the very same physical body must be transformed into soul.
Whosoever possesses his soul is endowed with extraordinary powers. Those who have attained the crystallization of their soul have converted themselves for such a motive into completely different creatures; this is written, as a testimony, within the sacred books of all religions of the world.
However, we know very well that “if the water does not boil at one hundred degrees” that which should crystallize is not crystallized, that which should disintegrate is not disintegrated. Thus, in any case, it is necessary for “the water to boil at one hundred degrees”… Obviously, if we do not pass through great emotional crises we cannot crystallize Soul either.
In order to radically dissolve any psychological inhuman aggregate, it is inevitably necessary to undergo a great emotional crisis. I have met people capable to undergo such crises; it is coming into my memory the case of certain Gnostic sister, from the Patriarchal headquarters in Mexico, who endured frightful tribulations, horrible moral crises when remembering grave errors from her former lives. Thus, people like this, with that tremendous capacity of remorse, persons which are capable to undergo very grave emotional crises, obviously can crystallize Soul.
Therefore, what is worthy for us is precisely that: the crystallization of all the psychological principles within own selves, here and now.
Instructors exist in the east who unfortunately have not eliminated all of that conjunction of undesirable elements that they carry within their psyche. It is not irrelevant to tell you, for your own knowledge, that such cited undesirable elements are denominated in Tibet as “psychological aggregates.” Indeed, such aggregates are nothing other than the same “I”s that personify our errors.
So, when one of those instructors (who have not eliminated his psychological aggregates) is in charge of a group of disciples, then unquestionably, his disciples must have a great patience and endure, the entire day, the gobbledygook of such an instructor. The disciples or chelas see, astonished, how psychological aggregates are passing in a continuous procession through the personality of such an instructor.
In the end, a moment in which the procession will cease will arrive, then the Master could express himself in order to give his teaching. This is the causa causorum by which the disciples of any of those instructors, who still have not eliminated their ego, have a patience elevated to the maximum. These type of chelas tolerate, tolerate and tolerate, because at any moment the Master finally takes possession of his vehicle and gives them his teachings.
It is nothing delectable to tolerate during an entire day insults from an instructor, to be a victim from all of his impertinences; but finally the Master arrives and that is what is important. Those instructors are fallen Bodhisattvas and they did not dissolve their ego yet, however since they are Bodhisattvas their disciples have to tolerate them until the Bodhisattva’s Inner Master arrives and give them his teachings. Thus, this is how those chelas of Tibetan disciples think.
The Psychological Aggregate
Sequentially, we would say that each psychological aggregate is like a person inside us. There is no doubt that those aggregates possess the three brains: intellectual, emotional and motor-instinctual-sexual; in other words, each “I” or each aggregate has its own ideas, concepts, desires, it performs determined actions; each aggregate enjoys a certain autonomy.
Looking these matters from this angle, having studied them in depth, we arrive at the logical and inevitable conclusion that many persons reside within our own person and what is more grave is that all of them quarrel amongst themselves, they fight for their own supremacy, each one of them wants to be the boss, the lord.
What would our interior house be similar to? I would say it would be similar to a horrifying mansion which would be attended by many servants and where each one of them would feel to be the lord. It is clear that looking at this house under the light of this reasoning it seems to be frightful and bizarre.
The intriguing aspects, in this case, are precisely the concepts that each one of these “lords” of such a house formulate; one of them says: “I want to eat, I am hungry,” yet, a second one enters into conflict and says: “To hell with food, I want to read the newspaper.” Further, a third one emerges in conflict and in an irrevocable way says: “Ask me if I care about food or about reading, I want to go to my buddy Joe’s house.” Thus, by uttering these words, all of them incongruent, the human personality, moved by those inner springs, abandons his abode in order to stroll somewhere along the streets.
If we could completely see our entire body (just as we psychologically are) in front of a mirror, I can asseverate to you that we would go perfectly mad, and this is because all of us are filled with infinite contradictions. This is ominous because we do not have a true, real existence.
All of us are beautiful when we are born, because all of us carry a percentage, three percent, of free consciousness, as I already stated in my book entitled, Treatise of Revolutionary Psychology; the rest, the ninety-seven percent, is bottled up within that multiplicity of the ego.
The consciousness which exists as free Essence impregnates the fecundated egg; thus reincorporated, it emerges into existence anew. So, the newly born child possesses that precisely: three percent of free consciousness that is not engulfed within any ego. Such percentage of manifested Essence within the child is self-cognizant.
How would a newly born child see the adults, his parents, siblings and relatives? The child would see them in the same way as when we see a drug-addicted person. But behold how the adults feel themselves, they even think they have authority to educate the child, and believe they can educate the child.
The child, in turn, feels completely awful, feeling he is as a victim of those who want to teach him. The child sees them from his own angle; since he is awakened, he perceives the psychological aggregates of his relatives, siblings, etc.; he also visualizes his own psychological aggregates that enter and leave the precinct and that go around his cradle. Sometimes his visions are so terrifying that the child can do nothing else but cry terrorized; but his parents do not understand these occurrences of their infant and at times they go to the pediatrician or in the worst of the cases, they go in search of some spiritualist or medium of evil omen that intend to “amend” the case, and this is the bizarre state in which this asleep humanity lives.
In any case, the wretched infant is a victim of all of the madness of adult people; the child has to tolerate with patience the flogging of his executioners, and this is the crude reality of the facts.
Posteriorly, when the human personality is already formed, all the psychological inhuman aggregates that belong to the infant began to enter in his body, then changes are noticed in the creature, the child becomes annoyed, jealous, angry, etc., and many other things.
This is lamentable, right? In the end, the one who was a child became adult, things change, the adult is no longer the self-cognizant playful child of early days, now he is the scoundrel from the tavern, the merchant, the lecherous, the jealous one, etc. Clearly, that child who was horrified when seeing the adults is now an adult and what is the worst in this case, is that his consciousness has become asleep and he is no longer capable of looking at himself with horror.
Verily, without a doubt, my brethren, each one of the psychological aggregates that emerge from within ourselves, have determined commitments. Therefore, we can state for instance, without any exaggeration, that the thief carries within himself a cave of thieves, and each one of them with different commitments in distinct days, hours and places. So, the unredeemed fornicator carries within his interior, to make all matters worse, a whore house; the murderer, obviously, carries within his psyche a club of assassins and, in their depth, each one of them carries his own commitments; likewise the merchant, who carries in his psychological depth a market place, etc.
The Law of Recurrence
But, how is our own destiny woven and unwoven? Much has been stated by Gurdjieff, Ouspensky, Nicoll, etc.; much had they commented about such aspects of the Law of Recurrence, however, in the field of investigation we have gone much further beyond, we know the living mechanism of the Law of Recurrence and this is very important.
An X individual, for example, who in his past existence was, let say, an adulterer and who had left his spouse for another lady, clearly when he will be reborn into a new body, he will bring in his psyche the “I” of adultery, the same “I” that committed such a crime. Such an “I” could not express itself in the first years of his infancy, impossible! since that event happened when he was thirty years old. Undoubtedly, his “I” of adultery will wait within the depth of his psyche within his infrahuman fields, his subjective spheres, until the same infamous thirty years of age arrive; so when such an age arrive, that “I” will emerge with great force and will take over the intellect, the emotional and the motor-instinctual-sexual centers of his human machine in order to go in search of the lady of his dreams. Beforehand, he would have been in telepathic communication with the ego of such a lady, possibly even having a blind date in some place of the city, maybe in a park or in a party, thus, obviously, this is how afterwards comes the stunning re-encounter.
What is intriguing is to see how that ego can haul the intellect, move the emotional and motor centers of the human machine and to take it precisely to the place where he has to encounter himself with the lady of his dreams. Inevitably, the same process has to be performed within her, thus this is how the scene will repeat again such as it happened in the past.
Now, let us suppose that a gentleman XX quarreled with another person, with another man in a tavern in his past existence because of this or that motive. Do you believe that because the physical body of both ceased to exist, such an “I” is going to disappear? No! Such an “I” will simply continue to exist within the unknown dimension; however, when it returns, when it takes a new physical body again, the moment in which such “I” will enter into activity will arrive, he will wait until the age in which such an event happened in the past existence. If such an event happened at the age of twenty-five, he will wait until the said twenty-five years, such an “I” will remain within the depth of his psyche until the moment arrives; obviously, that “I” will take over the centers of the human machine in order to repeat such an event. Beforehand, he would have been in telepathic communication with the other XX individual and they possibly had a "blind date" in another tavern, then they, when seeing each other, will recognize one another and will mutually hurt each other with their words again, thus, the event will be repeated.
Behold how underneath our cognitive zone and reasoning capacity, distinct commitments are performed; thus, this is how the Law of Recurrence works, this is the mechanism of such a law.
It is clear that by looking at these things in this way, in this manner, we do not have indeed what we could denominate total freedom or free will, the margin that we have of free will is very little, the margin of liberty that we possess is very little.
Verily, without a doubt, we are trapped within the mechanism of the Law of Recurrence and this is lamentable. If a person does not work upon his own life, that person is wasting his time miserably. In which way can we liberate ourselves from the Law of Recurrence? We can do it only by working upon our own life.
Unquestionably, our own life is made of dramas, tragedies and comedies. The comedy is for the clowns, the dramas are for the normal, common and ordinary people and the tragedies are for the perverse ones. In the days of yore, the tragic-ones were not accepted within the Mysteries; it was known that those were punished by the Gods and obviously the Guardian of the temple rejected them with the tip of his sword.
Do we need to dissolve the “I's"? Yes, this is what is logical; since these are the actors of the comedies, dramas and tragedies. Could perhaps a comedy exists without comics? Could a drama exist without actors? Do you believe that any tragedy could be developed in any scenario of the world without tragic-actors? Obviously, it could not! True?
Therefore, if we want to change our own life, what must we do? We have no other choice but to dissolve the actors of those comedies, dramas and tragedies. But, who are those actors? Where do they live and why? I tell you, indeed, that those actors are of time, that indeed, those actors come from ancient ages.
If we state that the “I” is a book of many volumes, then we are asseverating a great truth; if we affirm that the ego comes from many yesterdays, this is true. Therefore, the ego is time, the “I's" personify the time, they are our own defects, our own errors contained within the clock of time, they are the dust of times within the very depth of our psyche.
The Method for Dissolving Egos
When one knows the precise didactic for the dissolution of those undesirable elements that we carry inside, one then achieves unusual progress. Thus, it is indispensable, urgent and unpostponable to know the didactic with exactitude; only thus is possible the disintegration of those undesirable elements that we carry inside.
In Atlantis in the days of yore, an Initiate was born who developed in a delectable home, where only harmony, wisdom, wealth, perfection and love reigned. The moment in which that initiate achieved self-discovery by means of the diverse techniques of the mind arrived; then, with horror he became aware that he was carrying abominable elements within his interior; he then understood that he needed a special gymnasium, a psychological gymnasium. It is clear that in that his environment of perfection such gymnasium did not exist, thus he did not have any other choice than to abandon the house of his parents and to establish himself there, in one of those suburbs of any given Atlantean city. So, he created for himself his own psychological gymnasium, a gymnasium that allowed the self-discovery of his own defects; obviously, he disintegrated all of his psychological aggregates and became liberated. Indeed, my beloved brethren, the worst adversities offer us the best opportunities.
Constantly, letters from different younger brethren of the International Gnostic Movement arrive to me; some of them have complaints about their families, their father, their mother, their siblings; others protest against their wives, against their children; some others speak with horror against their husbands, etc., and, naturally, they ask for a balm in order to heal their painful heart. Until now, among all of those letters, I did not find, not even one at least, someone who is content with such adverse situations; all of them complain and this is deplorable. They do not want their psychological gymnasium, rather, they would like to flee from it; therefore, I as an instructor, have no other choice than to feel discouraged.
I say to myself: wretched people, they do not know how to take advantage of their psychological gymnasium! They want a paradise, they do not want to understand the necessity of adversities, they do not want to take benefit from the worst adversities; indeed, they do not long for their self-discovery! When one wants to self-know himself, one does it here, because in these gymnasiums of pain is where those defects that we carry hidden, flourish inevitably.
A discovered defect in such situations must be profoundly worked in all the levels of the mind; thus, when truly, indeed, one has comprehended this or that psychological type of error, this is indeed ready for its disintegration.
Since the bachelors/bachelorettes do not possess a hermetic crucible, it is obvious that they cannot work in the Ninth Sphere, but they can by all means to appeal to their Goddess Mother, Stella Maris, the Virgin of the Sea, that living and philosophical fire that lies latent within any organic or inorganic matter (Kundalini as She is called in the Hindustan).
Thus, if one appeal at that type of energy, if one focuses his heart, mind and most profound feelings on Her, I am sure that one will be assisted and that igneous power can reduce to ashes, to cosmic dust, that psychological aggregate in question.
However, it is convenient to know that precisely in the forge of the Cyclops is where that annular serpentine power, which develops within the body of the Gnostic ascetic, multiplies its power by means of the electro-sexual force.
Based on all of these motives, the woman who has a priest spouse or the man who has a priestess wife, can really work in-depth during their chemical copulation. It is enough for them to have the proper concentration in Devi Kundalini; evidently, She, the sacred cobra of ancient mysteries, when reinforced by the electric power of sex, by the transcendental sexual electricity, can indeed, annihilate, pulverize, reduce to ashes and in a very speedy way, any psychological aggregate that we had previously comprehended.
In any case, my dear brethren, before anything else, we need to discover the defect that we will reduce to dust; such a defect cannot be discovered if we do not use the sense of psychological self-observation. Any adverse situation offers us very rich opportunities. Unfortunately, people want to flee from all adverse situations, they protest instead of giving thanks to those brilliant occasions. The psychological gymnasium is very difficult, but the more difficult the gymnasium is for us, the better it is for our self-discovery.
Let us suppose for instance that we had to pass through a situation of jealousy: all of a sudden, one finds his spouse conversing, very quietly, very quietly with another person in one corner of our house. Such an encounter has nothing pleasant whatsoever; yet, it is magnificent for self-discovery. Possibly, during that event not only jealousy emerged, possibly there was also anger, we are nitpicking our spouse, thus perhaps there is also resentment because the “I” of self-esteem could feel hurt or offended.
In short, what should we do? Very quietly, in the night, we lie down in a dorsal decubitus posture (a reclining position in our bed), in other words, facing up with our body relaxed, eyes closed and, while breathing rhythmically, one has to reconstruct the scene just as it happened. So, by visualizing the scene, we will collect psychological data; we will find the ego of jealousy as a primary cause, second, the tremendous ego of anger, third, the ego of self-esteem mortally hurt. Thus, since we have discovered in that scene these three egos that entered into action, now we have to dissolve them. So, once these have been comprehended, we will have no choice but to reduce them to ashes, and for this and in any case, one has to immediately go and work in the Ninth Sphere, or possibly alone; since, it is clear that in those moments one does not feel like working in the Ninth Sphere, one feels offended and the only thing that would be convenient is a good bath and to pour a kilo of soap on us, so to see if with it such a bath that feeling will pass.
But if in spite of all, one achieves to have certain autonomy in order to work in the forge of the Cyclops, all the better; thus, one proceeds to the invocation of Kundalini Shakti, precisely during the chemical coitus. First of all, one beseeches Her to eliminate that repulsive monster of jealousy; second, after having worked the ego of jealousy in depth, one has to supplicate Her to destroy the monster of anger and thirdly the monster of self-esteem.
Certainly, people love themselves bountifully; that “I” of self-esteem is profoundly rooted in people all over the world; if they give us little pats on our backs we smile delectably, however, if they tell us some little humiliating word we become then ruthless and terrible. Thus, that “I” of self-esteem must be annihilated, it is (in our example) the third one upon which, for its annihilation, the full power of the Divine Shakti must be discharged. Afterwards, what eventually comes in subsequent days and hours has to be worked in the same way, until these three psychological associates from such a fatal scene are annihilated.
Obviously, it is in the practical life from where we have to extract the material for the dissolution of the ego; yet, the brethren have the tendency of escaping from their practical life, which is manifestly an absurdity.
When I was working in the dissolution of my ego, I remember that on a certain occasion a son of mine committed the error (when driving his car) of running over a person, a laborer. Certainly, it cost me a certain sum of money, about two thousand pesos for the wounded and another quantity for the police; thus, this is how I avoided having that youngster go to jail. However, the matter did not end there, the fact is that when I went to pay that debt, such a son, instead of thanking me, he protested with certain violence, my son disagreed with me, he did not want me to give those two thousand pesos to that unhappy wretched laborer, yet, for me, it was just to give him the money.
So, I gave to the wounded laborer the money. However, together with my son’s disapproval there were some words, if not of a grotesque character, but indeed, very ungrateful words. I did not feel anger, because of the fact of having dissolved it, but indeed I felt a certain pain in my heart.
Immediately, I enter into mediation in order to know the meaning of the pain that I felt in my heart, and this is how I verified within me the crude realism of an “I” of self-esteem that was wounded. Since I have very developed the sense of psychological self-observation, it was not difficult for me to perceive such an “I” in a direct way; thus, immediately I tossed against such a mournful “I” some sexual transcendental electrical discharges. I worked that “I” for some days and finally it was reducing itself little by little until it assumed the shape of a child, subsequently, it continue reducing itself until it became cosmic dust. Thus, this is how one has to work my dear brethren.
But, from where did I get the material in order to work? I got it from a concrete, clear and definitive fact! However, within the brethren exists the tendency of fleeing away from the practical facts of life and this is an absurdity, a complete absurdity.
On another occasion (and I like to cite between parenthesis lived examples with the purpose of collective orientation), I was very distressed with a certain irritability because of the words of that son, that indeed were not beautiful words. I always kept control over my mind and I never exploded, I never ripped my vestures; indeed, this was a triumph, yet, there is no doubt that there inside of me, deep inside, I cannot deny that some very unpleasant reactions were produced. So, when I explored myself with the sense of psychological self-observation, I discovered with great astonishment a very dumpy and robust “I,” very fat indeed, as hairy as a bear, walking in the corridor of my seigniorial house. “Ah, how very well hidden you were, damn you, I told him, now you are doomed because I will burn you, against me you have no hope.”
Conclusion: I appealed to Devi Kundalini Shakti in a didactic manner, and as I was working on this "I," it started to lose volume, it started getting smaller and as it got smaller it also became beautiful. It seemed like a small child, until one day the Divine Mother Kundalini decapitated it; and later, on time, it was reduced to dust; nothing was left of it. This is how, I dedicated myself fully to finishing with it, working day and night, every hour, every moment, until it no longer existed.
The sense of psychological Self-observation will be developed in every one of you as you use it. Don't forget that a sense that is not used will atrophy. A day will arrive in which your sense of Psychological Self-Observation will be fully developed in such a way that you will be able to perceive any undesirable psychological aggregate just as I do. Furthermore, you will be able to see the results of the work on such aggregates.
The Psychological Moon
My dear brethren, in the name of truth, I have to tell you that just as a moon exists in space, likewise within us also exists a psychological moon; and as the moon in the space which shines in the night has two faces (the one seen and the one not seen) likewise is the psychological moon within us.
The psychological moon has two aspects: one which is visible to our sense of psychological self-observation and one which is invisible: the occult, the unknown, incognito. However, this hidden aspect becomes visible when the psychological sense of self-observation has been developed to the maximum. So I believe you understand these things.
In the beginning you have to discharge fire against the psychological aggregates of the visible part of your psychological moon. Much later on, you have to discharge fire against the undesirable elements of the Black Moon, which are those psychological aggregates which are not seen so easily. Many saints annihilated the psychological aggregates of the visible part of their psychological moon but they didn't know anything about the undesirable elements of the other face of their psychological moon; nonetheless, they immersed themselves within Nirvana, and even Maha-Paranirvana. Despite this, they have to incarnate (take physical bodies) later on in order to continue their conscious work within the occult face of their psychological moon; because whether dealing with the merely visible aspect or the invisible face of our psychological moon, we have to discover these psychological elements from within the concrete facts of practical life in order to consciously work upon them.
Therefore, do not escape; do not try to evade real life. You have to be practical if indeed what you want is to disintegrate your ego. Thus, as you do it, as the psychological aggregates are pulverized, the bottled Essence is going to be emancipated. This is the path to crystallize that which is called Soul within us.
You will have to pass through great moral crises. This is not merely an intellectual matter, no. It is not simple demagogy, or insubstantial vain words of ambiguous chattering, no! Again, I repeat what I have said even though you might become tired of it, but indeed, "If the water does not boil at 100 degrees, that which has to be cooked is not cooked, meaning: that which has to be disintegrated is not disintegrated."
So, if we do not pass through shocking emotional crises, these "I's" cannot be disintegrated. I, for instance, felt a great deal of pain and I had to pass through a great emotional crisis when I saw the "I" of self-esteem well hidden within the deepest levels of my psyche; I suffered a lot, this is how I truly repented. Thereafter I begged Devi Kundalini Shakti to pulverize this undesirable element of mine.
When I discovered within me a very wicked demon full of anger and which came from very ancient times, I suffered the unspeakable; I passed through a horrible emotional crisis. I was ashamed of myself. I begged Kundalini Shakti to pulverize that abominable psychological element. So, do not escape practical life, because you will discover these undesirable elements in the field of practical life. All that you need is to be alert and vigilant as the watchman is in wartime.
When we are speaking, indeed, we have to be aware of the words we are saying! We have to be alert to our words. Do we have emotions? Yes we have them, but what sort of emotions do we have? Are they good? Are they bad? Could they be superior emotions or are they simply inferior? What are these emotions indicating to us?
Inferior emotions indicate inferior emotional "I's" which have to be disintegrated; yet, we have to discover them in the facts of practical life. Because, if we do not extract the consciousness from them, if we do not make our inferior emotions bleed with the knife of the self-criticism, then the development of the Superior Emotional Center will be impossible within us. Superior Emotion is necessary in order to receive the messages that come from the Superior Worlds.
So it is in practical life where we have to watch our words, our thoughts, our ideas. For instance, if, suddenly a lustful thought comes to one's mind, a morbid scene; do you believe that it comes just like that? What does this indicate? There is no doubt that behind this ominous cinema of our mind, behind this procession of morbid images, some "I" of lust is in activity. There exist "I's" of lust and they take possession of the ‘films' we carry in our brain; memories of passionate forms that they project on the screen of our intellect.
If one becomes fascinated with morbid scenes, one fortifies the "I's" of lust. So if we are assaulted by these sorts of thoughts, it is indispensable to invoke the assistance of our Divine Kundalini Shakti, and to reduce such an "I" into dust with her extraordinary flaming fire. If we don't proceed like this but we identify with it, if we like the scene of lust very much, then instead of such an "I" being dissolved, it will be fortified extraordinarily.
Every one of us has his Consciousness bottled up among all these actors of the different dramas, comedies and tragedies of life. Every one of us has his Consciousness bottled up within the egos. So, let us reduce the egos ("I's") to dust and the Consciousness will be free.
A free Consciousness is an illuminated Consciousness. It is a Consciousness which is able to see, hear and touch the great realities of the Superior Worlds, it is an Omniscient and Divine Consciousness.
The day you have annihilated your egos in their totality, then, what is the next thing you have to annihilate?... what? the seeds of the ego, of course. Because, when the ego dies the seeds are left. They are terribly malignant. These seeds must be disintegrated, reduced to dust.
We need to take possession of ourselves if we want to be Kings and Priests of Nature according to the Order of Melchizedek. We cannot take possession of ourselves while the Consciousness is still bottled up within the different undesirable elements of the psyche.
The consciousness that has taken possession of itself is a free Consciousness. A Consciousness that has taken possession of itself is admitted in the order of Melchizedek; it is an illuminated and perfect Consciousness. This is what we need.
The day you have acquired an illuminated Consciousness, the day you have made yourselves free, is the day you have crystallized that which is called Soul. You will be all Soul. Even your physical body will turn into Soul, and you will be filled with attributes and cosmic powers.
I have taught you today the practical didactic through a definitive dialectic. And now we are going to enter into meditation. But before we do it, it is necessary to know what we are going to work on, otherwise it will be worthless. As you are people who fight for self-discovery, it is obvious that you are working on such and such a psychological error. Is there anyone who still does not know what to work on? Is it possible that there is in this mediation group one who is not working on disintegrating a defect? If there is, I would like to meet him.