This "me" that you experience
is your ego.
You see, the science behind that is simple. Every time that we have committed an error and created an ego we have created a knot in cosmic flow. Every "I" is a Karmic chain link. When you become angry that is what envelopes you, is that link in the chain, and what you feel and sense in your body, in your heart and in your intellect are all the expressions of that anger, that chain. But what empowers it? What is it that gives that anger the ability to know what the other person is thinking or doing? What is it that gives that anger the capacity of seeing and expressing itself? It is the Consciousness. That anger is just a lens, a filter, over your Consciousness. You empower it. When lust entraps your mind and heart and body, and all you can see and think and feel is lust, what empowers it? You, your self.
That is why the Master Samael said, "Do not say and think and feel that your "I", your ego, is separate from you." It is not. It is you. It is you doing it. That sense of separation between me and my ego is a lie because the one who is feeding and empowering that ego is you. This is something many Gnostics get caught in. They think "I am not my ego, I am my Being!" That is mythomania, that is pride. It is a misconception that keeps them off the path; off the inner path of working on themselves because they think the pride is not themselves. "That lust is not me." Yes, it is. What is trapped in that lust, what expresses through that lust, is you. Free it and you will be free from sufferings.
As for your self-observation, that's something that will come better with practice. I would particularly recommend meditation. Grow accustomed to the practice of separating yourself from your thoughts. Relax yourself. And be not afraid.
I've provided a link below to the first lesson of "Meditation without Exertion." It's available as both an audio lecture and a transcription. You should check it out, whichever version you prefer. And practice. There are five other lessons in that course if you want to continue listening.
Regarding the environment of hell, most of the descriptions that are given of hell are symbolic. My impression, based on limited experience, is that the "environment" is somewhat subjective. You can, however, read more about Hell, if it interests you, in Samael's book
Hell, Devil, and Karma, which I've also linked to below. But I would caution you not to let your work be motivated by fear. Hell is real. There is no doubt or ambiguity about that. But the fear of Hell is a hell in itself. Don't let your fear carry you to that place. Find momentum in love and longing for your Innermost, and your Innermost, in love and longing for you, will assist you.