Wednesday, 07 January 2015
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Ever since I've found out about these teachings I've had a certain attitude in mind. Firstly, I would practice the first key, which involved acquiring a certain development of self-observation and awareness and the practice of the death. Than the second key, would be to practice alchemy and third key would be sacrifice for humanity.
Even though I had a certain level of progress in the beginning, I soon fell victim to entropy. Not once but repeatedly; over ten years to be exact. I always believed that working on myself first would be better, and I would attract the right partner for this work. And this seems to be the advice given here on this website. So I started to fear attracting the wrong partner. I felt that any person that I met before a certain level of inner purity and chastity is attained, would likely be the wrong partner. So I started to shut people out. And being someone who suffers from a social anxiety and avoidant personality disorder didn't help either. Perhaps the advice given to people that they should work on themselves first is for people who are seen as casanovas. Me on the other hand have been single all my life. Not a single relationship whatsoever.
If I continue to "work on myself first", I will probably reach the age of 40 and still be single. I now have become increasingly anxious feeling that I will never find anyone. Or that the person I meet will become a distraction and pull me away from these teachings, which makes me fear meeting people and almost feel anger for such unrighteous people to come into my life. I no longer have the strength to sit down and meditate. Instead of being more at peace, my egos have multiplied. Master Samael Aun Weor is right. Being single and remaining celibate for a long time causes problems. It makes the person cynical and turns them into infra-sexuals. The pranayama for single people is a good but not very powerful in transforming the sexual energy. I don't think Master Samael was single when he was my age. He was married already. Heck, he had a prior relationship before his marriage to Master Litelantes.
So I've started to think that my attitude is harming me. The foundation of change is alchemy. Everything else is a waste of time and only serves to keep egos at bay for a while before entropy kicks in. Besides working on myself requires me to face my demons such as fear of rejection, fear of commitment and fear of intimacy.
For most people, anxieties and desires are probably motivating factors to mingle with people. For me on the other hand, are things I ignore and see as negative things that need to be destroyed. But its ironic how such people have now found their partners in which they can practice these teachings in its entirety. Its ironic, because the spiritual path is more important than anything for me, yet I am failing to progress without a partner.
It would have been nice if other students could have shared their experiences. But given that is not allowed, perhaps the instructors have come across similar situations where people have actually feared getting involved with the wrong people. I personally feel like life is trying to swallow me up and push me away from the path. So how do we take a leap of faith and be open to love when there is so much fear that we might be heading down the wrong path, the horizontal path of life.
Nevertheless, I still believe that the type of people to mingle with is of utmost importance, and would only be truly open to someone who has a spiritual uneasiness and wants the same thing as I do.
So what say you? Do we go out and socialize with people, or do we sit inside our rooms and meditate on our egos?
Even though I had a certain level of progress in the beginning, I soon fell victim to entropy. Not once but repeatedly; over ten years to be exact. I always believed that working on myself first would be better, and I would attract the right partner for this work. And this seems to be the advice given here on this website. So I started to fear attracting the wrong partner. I felt that any person that I met before a certain level of inner purity and chastity is attained, would likely be the wrong partner. So I started to shut people out. And being someone who suffers from a social anxiety and avoidant personality disorder didn't help either. Perhaps the advice given to people that they should work on themselves first is for people who are seen as casanovas. Me on the other hand have been single all my life. Not a single relationship whatsoever.
If I continue to "work on myself first", I will probably reach the age of 40 and still be single. I now have become increasingly anxious feeling that I will never find anyone. Or that the person I meet will become a distraction and pull me away from these teachings, which makes me fear meeting people and almost feel anger for such unrighteous people to come into my life. I no longer have the strength to sit down and meditate. Instead of being more at peace, my egos have multiplied. Master Samael Aun Weor is right. Being single and remaining celibate for a long time causes problems. It makes the person cynical and turns them into infra-sexuals. The pranayama for single people is a good but not very powerful in transforming the sexual energy. I don't think Master Samael was single when he was my age. He was married already. Heck, he had a prior relationship before his marriage to Master Litelantes.
So I've started to think that my attitude is harming me. The foundation of change is alchemy. Everything else is a waste of time and only serves to keep egos at bay for a while before entropy kicks in. Besides working on myself requires me to face my demons such as fear of rejection, fear of commitment and fear of intimacy.
For most people, anxieties and desires are probably motivating factors to mingle with people. For me on the other hand, are things I ignore and see as negative things that need to be destroyed. But its ironic how such people have now found their partners in which they can practice these teachings in its entirety. Its ironic, because the spiritual path is more important than anything for me, yet I am failing to progress without a partner.
It would have been nice if other students could have shared their experiences. But given that is not allowed, perhaps the instructors have come across similar situations where people have actually feared getting involved with the wrong people. I personally feel like life is trying to swallow me up and push me away from the path. So how do we take a leap of faith and be open to love when there is so much fear that we might be heading down the wrong path, the horizontal path of life.
Nevertheless, I still believe that the type of people to mingle with is of utmost importance, and would only be truly open to someone who has a spiritual uneasiness and wants the same thing as I do.
So what say you? Do we go out and socialize with people, or do we sit inside our rooms and meditate on our egos?
Accepted Answer
Master Samael never said that being single is a problem. He said that celibacy, sexual abstinence without transmutation, is destructive.
As for pranayama, the methods are effective and work. If you are not successful with the methods, you must analyze and re-evaluate your application of them, because the practices are not at fault for your suffering.
If anyone fails to progress in this path, it is because of the mind. Even if one gets married in a dejected, despairing, and morbid state of mind, then a matrimony will make that doubly worse, because "it is always a great responsibility to be two" according to Friedrich Nietzsche.
Being married implies more work, and if you are struggling to work on yourself individually, it will be twice as challenging when working in sexual cooperation and marital union.
Aquarius is the house of confraternity, friendship, and social interaction. In this Aquarian era, we must learn to be more useful to our fellow man, to be social, and to work in the silence and privacy of our homes through psychoanalytical meditation as we gather observational material about ourselves through our interactions with our friends, neighbors, family, strangers, etc.
You find your alchemical partner based on your psychological works. When you show maturity in yourself, working to comprehend and annihilate what must be comprehended and annihilated, then you will receive understanding. With understanding, you will know who your partner is based on the growth, blossoming, and development of your soul.
Study the link below!
As for pranayama, the methods are effective and work. If you are not successful with the methods, you must analyze and re-evaluate your application of them, because the practices are not at fault for your suffering.
If anyone fails to progress in this path, it is because of the mind. Even if one gets married in a dejected, despairing, and morbid state of mind, then a matrimony will make that doubly worse, because "it is always a great responsibility to be two" according to Friedrich Nietzsche.
Being married implies more work, and if you are struggling to work on yourself individually, it will be twice as challenging when working in sexual cooperation and marital union.
Aquarius is the house of confraternity, friendship, and social interaction. In this Aquarian era, we must learn to be more useful to our fellow man, to be social, and to work in the silence and privacy of our homes through psychoanalytical meditation as we gather observational material about ourselves through our interactions with our friends, neighbors, family, strangers, etc.
You find your alchemical partner based on your psychological works. When you show maturity in yourself, working to comprehend and annihilate what must be comprehended and annihilated, then you will receive understanding. With understanding, you will know who your partner is based on the growth, blossoming, and development of your soul.
Study the link below!
For thirty years I sought God. But when I looked carefully I found that in reality God was the seeker and I the sought. -Bayazid al-Bastami
Accepted Answer
Master Samael never said that being single is a problem. He said that celibacy, sexual abstinence without transmutation, is destructive.
As for pranayama, the methods are effective and work. If you are not successful with the methods, you must analyze and re-evaluate your application of them, because the practices are not at fault for your suffering.
If anyone fails to progress in this path, it is because of the mind. Even if one gets married in a dejected, despairing, and morbid state of mind, then a matrimony will make that doubly worse, because "it is always a great responsibility to be two" according to Friedrich Nietzsche.
Being married implies more work, and if you are struggling to work on yourself individually, it will be twice as challenging when working in sexual cooperation and marital union.
Aquarius is the house of confraternity, friendship, and social interaction. In this Aquarian era, we must learn to be more useful to our fellow man, to be social, and to work in the silence and privacy of our homes through psychoanalytical meditation as we gather observational material about ourselves through our interactions with our friends, neighbors, family, strangers, etc.
You find your alchemical partner based on your psychological works. When you show maturity in yourself, working to comprehend and annihilate what must be comprehended and annihilated, then you will receive understanding. With understanding, you will know who your partner is based on the growth, blossoming, and development of your soul.
Study the link below!
As for pranayama, the methods are effective and work. If you are not successful with the methods, you must analyze and re-evaluate your application of them, because the practices are not at fault for your suffering.
If anyone fails to progress in this path, it is because of the mind. Even if one gets married in a dejected, despairing, and morbid state of mind, then a matrimony will make that doubly worse, because "it is always a great responsibility to be two" according to Friedrich Nietzsche.
Being married implies more work, and if you are struggling to work on yourself individually, it will be twice as challenging when working in sexual cooperation and marital union.
Aquarius is the house of confraternity, friendship, and social interaction. In this Aquarian era, we must learn to be more useful to our fellow man, to be social, and to work in the silence and privacy of our homes through psychoanalytical meditation as we gather observational material about ourselves through our interactions with our friends, neighbors, family, strangers, etc.
You find your alchemical partner based on your psychological works. When you show maturity in yourself, working to comprehend and annihilate what must be comprehended and annihilated, then you will receive understanding. With understanding, you will know who your partner is based on the growth, blossoming, and development of your soul.
Study the link below!
For thirty years I sought God. But when I looked carefully I found that in reality God was the seeker and I the sought. -Bayazid al-Bastami
I'm bringing up this article again because yet another year has passed and I am still suffering from the same problems. I have actually become suicidal now. I'm nearly 33 years old and I am still single. Never had a friendship or any form of contact with the opposite sex whatsoever. What quite ordinarily takes place for a teenager such as something as simple as holding hands with someone you're attracted hasn't even taken place at my age for me. If some people I know around me, actually knew I was a virgin, they'll probably "hang me".
Now that I see myself approaching the end, I can't help but feel that my spiritual pride has led me to this. Never going to bars to meet new people, refusing to use online dating and only mingling in events that have some form of spirituality has reduced my chances of meeting people. I can't help but feel that Gnosis has harmed me. Perhaps if I had learned about it later in my life I would have had a better chance of finding someone since I would't be behaving so fanatical. I wouldn't live my life waiting for magic to happen. I wouldn't be trapped in this vicious circle of wanting to progress first. Master Samael has always taught us that sexual alchemy is indispensable to progress. That it is very help and powerful, what one can not be overcome without alchemy, would probably be overcome with alchemy. And having love in life for the first time would probably give strength.
People have even called me mentally ill and sick for simply being single at my age. I've been criticized, mocked, looked down upon, ridiculed simply because I've been living a single life. A celibate since birth. I don't know what to do any more. I've prayed to get help with regards to this, but its all been in vain.
We are told that based on our inner work does a partner appear. What about people who don't know about these teachings and already have partner?
Now that I see myself approaching the end, I can't help but feel that my spiritual pride has led me to this. Never going to bars to meet new people, refusing to use online dating and only mingling in events that have some form of spirituality has reduced my chances of meeting people. I can't help but feel that Gnosis has harmed me. Perhaps if I had learned about it later in my life I would have had a better chance of finding someone since I would't be behaving so fanatical. I wouldn't live my life waiting for magic to happen. I wouldn't be trapped in this vicious circle of wanting to progress first. Master Samael has always taught us that sexual alchemy is indispensable to progress. That it is very help and powerful, what one can not be overcome without alchemy, would probably be overcome with alchemy. And having love in life for the first time would probably give strength.
People have even called me mentally ill and sick for simply being single at my age. I've been criticized, mocked, looked down upon, ridiculed simply because I've been living a single life. A celibate since birth. I don't know what to do any more. I've prayed to get help with regards to this, but its all been in vain.
We are told that based on our inner work does a partner appear. What about people who don't know about these teachings and already have partner?
When looking for a partner, we must be open and receptive to the will of the divine. Yet this does not mean that you do not continue your search and keep your eyes open for the right opportunity! It is in men's nature to hunt, seek, and find the right partner, and women likewise must be receptive and open, searching and seeking, to find the right man for themselves; therefore it is important that you are searching and keeping your heart and mind open.
Let me clearly state: Gnosis does not teach individuals to repress or be celibate, avoiding social contact and gatherings, being antisocial. We emphasize that we must enter into sexual magic with the right person, whether they are "Gnostic" or not. That is all. Conscious love is the only requisite for a marriage. Staying alone at home, indulging in melancholic, negative, destructive and repressive behavior has nothing to do with these teachings.
Sexual magic is indispensable for achieving the totality and height of this work. It is not mandatory to begin, develop and progress a great deal.
Sounds like you need to loosen up and hang out with some friends or people! While in these studies, I always associate with people, whether Gnostic or not, being among the sheep and the goats, yet working to remain neither... Here is a clue to your situation if you can see it!
People who are married and enter into these studies then must learn how to transmute where before they fornicated. Entering into alchemical practice is a decision determined by both partners, out of rectitude and love.
Let me clearly state: Gnosis does not teach individuals to repress or be celibate, avoiding social contact and gatherings, being antisocial. We emphasize that we must enter into sexual magic with the right person, whether they are "Gnostic" or not. That is all. Conscious love is the only requisite for a marriage. Staying alone at home, indulging in melancholic, negative, destructive and repressive behavior has nothing to do with these teachings.
Sexual magic is indispensable for achieving the totality and height of this work. It is not mandatory to begin, develop and progress a great deal.
Sounds like you need to loosen up and hang out with some friends or people! While in these studies, I always associate with people, whether Gnostic or not, being among the sheep and the goats, yet working to remain neither... Here is a clue to your situation if you can see it!
People who are married and enter into these studies then must learn how to transmute where before they fornicated. Entering into alchemical practice is a decision determined by both partners, out of rectitude and love.
Joyful in hope, suffering in tribulation, be thou constant in thy prayer.
Benedictis, qui venit in nomine Domini. Osanna in excelsis.
"Blessed is he who comes in the name of the Lord. Hosanna in the highest!"
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