Hi, im new to this forum and i need help from someone cus i have some questions, but they are all related. First, i maintain myself in "chastity" (not totally 'cus im 17 and i can't practice the maithuna yet), and im really new to this all, i mean, sexual transmutation practices involving touch, like the Vajroli Mudra, but, whenever i am finished practicing the rejuvenation rites, after or sometimes during the vajroli mudra, this liquid leaks out, ordinary people call it "pre-cum"(i dont like the names they put on stuff, but since i dont know a polite way to say it, i say it that way) and i am confused, is this a bad or a common thing, because i dont even get close to an orgasm, so i tought this would be a bad thing. I tought of it as a common thing after some thinking, since it must be a fluid for lubrication of the seminal vases, but i dont know.
Second question, about these sexual transmutation for single people, is it always safe to practice them? I know it is safe to practice them, i mean, theres sometimes when i feel that my energy is polluted because sometimes i have these relapses and end up doing things i am completely ashamed of, its not even big things i never cross any lines(i never ejaculate, even when im asleep, i know i dont), but it makes me feel bad anyways. And then i feel my energy polluted and i feel like i should take some time before making those energy transmutation, i fear that it might do something bad to me if i do these with my energy "unclean". So the question is, doing sexual energy transmutation techniques is good or bad after i done "something bad"?
So, i keep this "chastity", and i wanted to ask, even though im fighting against all my "I's", what do i do after i have a relapse or something, even though no "crime" happens? Does someone know something i could do to "fix my energies", i repent and pray to my divine mother for forgiveness but should i ask her to "fix" the energies?
Well thats all i wanted to ask for now, im sorry if i done something wrong by posting this, and im sorry because the way i write is somewhat confuse. But as long as someone give me a good answer, i will be thankfull.
Thanks