I have a terrible time resisting temptation because I have an addiction to sense pleasure that needs to be eliminated.
I have had memorable experiences but with no consistency because I am unhealthy in mind and have a lot of Karma.
I read Samael Aun Weor and the Bhagavad Gita and the Holy Bible and the Quran and the Bodhicharyavatara . . .
But, I still fail so much and ignore attempting to meditate because I am addicted to music and the female body and my own body.
Santideva explains beautifully that flesh has no consciousness, yet, I lust so weakly over it and I don't comprehend. Like, polishing a weapon for suicide.

Can someone show me consequences of wasting time with this lust for repeating sensations? I need Thelema. I need comprehension. Of course, I need to meditate.
I need to renounce without identifying. But, I am very weak.
How to be stronger?
Thank you.