Thursday, 07 February 2013
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I have been studying, and attempting to practice the tradition for two years now, My major obstacle, is that I become extremely discouraged, and frustrated, to the point where I no longer can sit and meditate, or concentrate at all. After I loose my energy.. It feels as though my willpower over the mind is gone..

I have been struggling with this problem of nocturnal emission for the past two years, and I cannot seem to reverse the flow. It seems, I can only retain the energy for two-three weeks at a time, before a scenario in an unconscious dream happens, where I lose my energy. This is entirely frustrating, because it always seems to happen, as if I am just witnessing it, and I never had a choice; my free will is never present in these unconscious dreams. After about two weeks time passes, of working with pranayama, I will reach a point where these dreams will start to occur, they will happen night after night, the lustful scenarios will persist, I may endure, and get past 2 or 3 nights in a row of these dreams, but eventually, I will just be placed in a dream scenario, where I literally was never given a choice at all, it just happens.. I wakeup discouraged, and this frustrated mental state prevents me from effectively meditating, then from there, after not practicing meditation for a day or two, I find myself trapped in the mind, no longer with a willpower to overcome, or unable to genuinely pray when I find myself in ordeals in my daily life, ect. ect, it's like a cascading effect..

For the past two years I have been persistent in trying everything that is recommended: pranayama, inscence burning, ending lustful thoughts/praying to the mother, but it seems, no matter how hard I try, it is not working, and the energy just finds a way to express itself...

This is deeply bothersome, and I feel as though I am no longer making progress, my meditation practices are stagnating, I cannot maintain mindfulness during the day. I am again trapped in the cage of the mind.. The terrible thing, is I have experienced this cycle so many times now over the past two years, I can almost see it happening, without any control of the cycle, or not enough wisdom to overcome it..

The cycle starts of as First I am really discouraged.. Then after some scenario where I am (figuratively) slapped in the face, and told to get back to the work. (by the messages conveyed my dreams I am writing down.) Then from these experiences I generate enough willpower try as hard as I can, I persist everyday with pranayama and meditation, which leads to some astral projection.. Then after two or three weeks pass, my practices start to lack, or something in my life happens which leads to not enough spare time to practice, or the dreams will come back and this cycle begins again...

I personally feel the problem isn't actually that I don't consistently do ritual and magic.
It seems impractical, to do all of this, every single day:
-Burning sulfer/sage
-Reciting Conjuration of belelin, four, seven, solomon. and circle
-Practicing Runes,
-Working with Agave Americana

It just doesn't seem practical, I don't have enough leisure time to do everyone of these practices every single day, I would have no time for actual meditation, and this would keep me identified with my mind mind.. Unless these practices are intended for the astral plane? I don't understand the idea of magic and ritual.. and to be honest, I totally do not have any comprehension whatsoever doing such advanced things, when I can barely handle the practice of "not identifying with the mind", let alone, trying to carry out the recitation of words, and actions, and ritual, all the while somehow not identifying with the mind..

I come from a buddhist background, I am certain the problem lies inside of me, not outside of me.. Is there some type of practice I can do in the astral, that is more powerful for the transmutation of my energies? I feel as though, my ability to project comes from the practice of pranayama itself I have never been able to astrally project, unless practicing pranayama first, for a dew days at least.. so when it does occur, would it not then be logical to bring the work of transmutation to that higher octave then? How can I properly direct and use this energy? Like for disintegrating these defects, and ending these cycles?

I need to hear a story of someone who struggled in the same way, and actually overcame this great ordeal of reversing the flow of their energy, without the assistance or reliance on a wife, because I am a single. I need a real story, not an allegorical one; a story from someone in these gnostic studies whom experienced this ordeal first hand, and found out their own process of working with the practices to end the torment of nocturnal emissions..
11 years ago
·
#3092
Accepted Answer
There are many students facing the same struggle and difficulty, and the antidote that works is the same for everyone. The cause for the problem will be found in your experiences during the day. There is some psychological habit that is allowing the nighttime experience to continue. It may not appear on the surface to be related to lust. This is why meditation is so important: with meditation, one should free the consciousness from the intellect and reasoning, so that you can observe the problem intuitively. This is the only way we can see the cage and know how to break it.

The rituals and prayers help with protection. Without them, you will be weaker. This is especially important if some diabolic entity is taking advantage of your psychological scenario. Without the prayers and rituals, it is easier for others to manipulate you whether in the physical or internal worlds.

Since you are asking about practices for the astral plane, if you can awaken in the astral plane, the most important thing you can do is pray to be shown the cause and the solution of your current problem. The whole reason we want to awaken internally is to acquire that information.

Rest assured, the problem can be solved. Bear in mind it will be solved not through effort, but through peace and serenity.
11 years ago
·
#3092
Accepted Answer
There are many students facing the same struggle and difficulty, and the antidote that works is the same for everyone. The cause for the problem will be found in your experiences during the day. There is some psychological habit that is allowing the nighttime experience to continue. It may not appear on the surface to be related to lust. This is why meditation is so important: with meditation, one should free the consciousness from the intellect and reasoning, so that you can observe the problem intuitively. This is the only way we can see the cage and know how to break it.

The rituals and prayers help with protection. Without them, you will be weaker. This is especially important if some diabolic entity is taking advantage of your psychological scenario. Without the prayers and rituals, it is easier for others to manipulate you whether in the physical or internal worlds.

Since you are asking about practices for the astral plane, if you can awaken in the astral plane, the most important thing you can do is pray to be shown the cause and the solution of your current problem. The whole reason we want to awaken internally is to acquire that information.

Rest assured, the problem can be solved. Bear in mind it will be solved not through effort, but through peace and serenity.
11 years ago
·
#3107
Thank you for your quick reply, and the resources to research deeper on my own.

I am very grateful that our paths have crossed to receive this advice, even if it was just digitally.

-Namaste
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