Dear Instructors,
Those of us who are here on this site, and others like it, have longings in different degrees and find mundane life quite empty and ephemeral. Yet, not all of us are practicing seriously - or have, but in spurts - even to the degree that we might be in Gnosis for 15-20 years without having done much work. Therefore, we lose faith and thus slowly deviate from even the preliminary path, and perhaps choose to go all in for the nonspiritual life, but without our inner inquietude disappearing.
However, to increase one's longings and faith, work is necessary. Yet, because we do not have enough zeal from the get-go (perhaps, we had, but weakened it) in order to work seriously, we find ourselves in a strange lukewarm middle ground where we have longings that are not strong enough, but with some degree of repulsion to the mundane life, but, contradictorily enough, still attached to it through different desires we seek to fulfill. It seems like a difficult catch 22 to get out of; to increase longing we need to work, but we don't have the zealous longing to even do the minimal requirements, such as meditating on, for example, this problem of 'to be or not to be' sufficiently. Thus, we remain indefinite, and miserably waste our time. On one shoulder, the angel calls for us, while on the other, the devil entices us. And this inner conflict is quite excruciating.
Putting it this way make it seem that there is an absolute contradiction, but it might just be a false dichotomy, and it might be a more nuanced problem than I make it out to be.
Please advise.
Those of us who are here on this site, and others like it, have longings in different degrees and find mundane life quite empty and ephemeral. Yet, not all of us are practicing seriously - or have, but in spurts - even to the degree that we might be in Gnosis for 15-20 years without having done much work. Therefore, we lose faith and thus slowly deviate from even the preliminary path, and perhaps choose to go all in for the nonspiritual life, but without our inner inquietude disappearing.
However, to increase one's longings and faith, work is necessary. Yet, because we do not have enough zeal from the get-go (perhaps, we had, but weakened it) in order to work seriously, we find ourselves in a strange lukewarm middle ground where we have longings that are not strong enough, but with some degree of repulsion to the mundane life, but, contradictorily enough, still attached to it through different desires we seek to fulfill. It seems like a difficult catch 22 to get out of; to increase longing we need to work, but we don't have the zealous longing to even do the minimal requirements, such as meditating on, for example, this problem of 'to be or not to be' sufficiently. Thus, we remain indefinite, and miserably waste our time. On one shoulder, the angel calls for us, while on the other, the devil entices us. And this inner conflict is quite excruciating.
Putting it this way make it seem that there is an absolute contradiction, but it might just be a false dichotomy, and it might be a more nuanced problem than I make it out to be.
Please advise.
Accepted Answer
The solution is to enact the principles of repentance, remorse, conscience, reflection, etc.:
For thirty years I sought God. But when I looked carefully I found that in reality God was the seeker and I the sought. -Bayazid al-Bastami
Accepted Answer
The solution is to enact the principles of repentance, remorse, conscience, reflection, etc.:
For thirty years I sought God. But when I looked carefully I found that in reality God was the seeker and I the sought. -Bayazid al-Bastami
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