As the title would lead to say, I've had some dilemmas about the path.
Whenever I reject the teachings or the path, divinity always reminds me. They show
me the void in great detail, how to pronounce the mantra "Klim...." etc. (Which most
accurately forms the star immediately). I have also learned about my inner guide,
who never ceases to guide me, even though I've committed some serious crimes
against nature. My divine mother literally asked me why I'm treating her like a criminal
when I am the actual murderer, this she asked when I did not want to sit at her table.
After this she transformed into a great serpent and showed me what I have to work with,
more specifically Lust and Anger. But she also knows that I won't get myself to do
pranayama daily, since that turns into a failure every time.
So I have two questions. The first one is: Why they won't leave me alone when I want
to be left alone? If I belong to the void, I feel that it could wait to have me devoured,
when I'm dead. The second question is: Since they won't leave me alone, how can I
make a deal with divinity in regards to transmutation?
You have my regards