Dear Instructors,
In the recent months I have focused a lot on developing concentration/ visualisation and increasing my practice time. In turn however, I did not get out of the house much and therefore my practice of self-observation was quite limited. In the last two days I had to go to a mandatory checkup for military service, which put me in contact with a lot of people from my past, with whom I broke off contact (because all their interests circle around drinking, smoking etc.) The result was quite shocking. I wasn't able to observe or remember myself at all. I completely fell into negative behavior and speech patterns from the past (sarcasm etc.) To tell the truth I am quite ashamed of myself, but I suppose it is good to see the truth about where I actually stand in my progress.
I am thinking about creating challenging situations for my ego on purpose now. Creating a psychological gymnasium so to speak. Is it better then, to sacrifice time that could be spent meditating in order to get into such situations? Is it better to meditate five hours a day and create a challenging situation for the ego than to meditate ten hours a day without doing so? Has any one of you ever had the necessity to do so along your path?
I would also like to ask another question if I may: It is said that a male should wait until reaching the age of 21 to practice sexual magic. Given that we likely have very limited time, I was wondering if in some situations it would be necessary to start earlier. I am perfectly willing to wait until I am 21 if it is beneficial (I am 17 now), but if for example I started at 18 that would be three years of work, which is quite a long time. What would you recommend?
Should practicioners in my age generally go out and socialize with the opposite sex in order to not repress sexuality? (I ask because I haven't been doing that.) It seems to me that this would also be a good way to learn about your own ego, as long as one doesn't fall into lust.
I apologize for the lenght of my questions.
Thank you for your help. May peace be upon you.
In the recent months I have focused a lot on developing concentration/ visualisation and increasing my practice time. In turn however, I did not get out of the house much and therefore my practice of self-observation was quite limited. In the last two days I had to go to a mandatory checkup for military service, which put me in contact with a lot of people from my past, with whom I broke off contact (because all their interests circle around drinking, smoking etc.) The result was quite shocking. I wasn't able to observe or remember myself at all. I completely fell into negative behavior and speech patterns from the past (sarcasm etc.) To tell the truth I am quite ashamed of myself, but I suppose it is good to see the truth about where I actually stand in my progress.
I am thinking about creating challenging situations for my ego on purpose now. Creating a psychological gymnasium so to speak. Is it better then, to sacrifice time that could be spent meditating in order to get into such situations? Is it better to meditate five hours a day and create a challenging situation for the ego than to meditate ten hours a day without doing so? Has any one of you ever had the necessity to do so along your path?
I would also like to ask another question if I may: It is said that a male should wait until reaching the age of 21 to practice sexual magic. Given that we likely have very limited time, I was wondering if in some situations it would be necessary to start earlier. I am perfectly willing to wait until I am 21 if it is beneficial (I am 17 now), but if for example I started at 18 that would be three years of work, which is quite a long time. What would you recommend?
Should practicioners in my age generally go out and socialize with the opposite sex in order to not repress sexuality? (I ask because I haven't been doing that.) It seems to me that this would also be a good way to learn about your own ego, as long as one doesn't fall into lust.
I apologize for the lenght of my questions.
Thank you for your help. May peace be upon you.